A day in the life

So I thought I would tell you all about the interesting day I had on Saturday. The day was supposed to be pretty easy going, a nice trip to the lake with some friends after a stop at the BMV. Nothing too exciting or ground breaking was supposed to happen there. But alas that is not what transpired. Here is a time line of the events.

12:00 a.m. - finish up watching the Dark Knight. It is good, don't believe any one who tells you anything different.

12:15 a.m. - start watching Hancock, I was excited because I like Will Smith and Jason Bateman.

12:20 a.m. - realizes Hancock is going to be a train wreck.

12:25 a.m. - starts wondering who is going to win the next Elle Woods on MTV's Legally Blonde the Musical: The search for Elle Woods because it is more interesting than what is going on currently in the movie.

2:00 a.m.-ish - arrive home and immediately pass out.

8:00 a.m.-ish - Wake up and start looking for swimming suits, towels and other items that will need to be washed and packed for the lake.

8:30 a.m. - leave for BMV with Cora.

8:40 a.m. - finish at BMV, that's right it only took like 10 minutes and was not frustrating ... the irony looking back on the day is stunning.

8:50 a.m. - change the oil and air filter in my truck in preparation for the trip.

9:15 a.m. - start routine maintenance of the boat (change oil, check fluids, sweep the floors, put it all back together)

10:00 a.m. - find raccoon in boat and nearly poop my pants.


As I was checking to make sure we had enough life vests on board for our trip I had flipped up one of the holds to find a little leg sticking out of a pile of life vests. I was not expecting this when I opened the hold and understandably might have lost controls of my bowels for a second or two.

10:15 a.m. - After retrieving the said raccoon and naming him/her (Reynaldo is his/hers name) I see mother raccoon scampering out of the boat.


11:00 a.m. - finish up boat prep, begin preparation for Raccoon fatherhood.

12:00 a.m. - finally leave house with boat in tow.

12:30 p.m. - light telling me my truck battery is not being charge begins flashing in my truck.

12:31 p.m. - start inventing new curse words in my head.

12:32 p.m. - start inventing reasons in my head why this isn't a big deal and how I can fix it once we get there.

12:32 p.m. - go back to creating curse words.

1:32 p.m. - truck loses power ... with 4500 pound boat attached.

1:45 p.m. - friend who has been following me tries to charge battery for the first time.

1:46 p.m. - truck loses power. (Mind you we are 3 miles away from the lake ... 3)


2:30 p.m. - friends return with new battery for truck.

2:45 p.m. - finally get to lake about an hour plus late, because my truck is super special.

2:50 p.m. - as I am backing the boat off the trailer the rubber boot protecting the boat from the trailer goes flying into the water, luckily it is retrieved by my intrepid friend E Sizzle.

3:00 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. - have a pretty good time on the lake. Cora had never been to Indian Lake. She thought it was pretty cute. We all looked at a lot of houses on the lake and wished we owned them. Cora was super pumped about the McDonalds on the lake with docks. I personally have always been disappointed by the lack of boat thru window.

6:45 p.m. - put the boat back on the trailer pretty smoothly, Cora pilots, Nathan drives the truck and I take all the credit. Is this a sign of an easy time on the way home?????

7:05 p.m. - question is answered. No is the answer. Truck loses power, battery is charged by our friends mighty mighty Mazda 3 for the 34th time that day.

7:15 p.m. - truck decides that it's had enough, no longer wants to hold a charge, no longer wants to go anywhere. Luckily for us it dies in the middle of no where on the side of a road where it can be easily plowed into by cars, trucks, tractors or live stock.

7:16 p.m. - curse words start flowing again in my head.

8:00 p.m. - savior/brother shows up to haul boat home. Luckily this means Cora can go home and do her home work that's due at 11:55 p.m. ... on a Saturday (make your own judgements). This also means she is no longer going to kill me and my marriage may continue.

8:10 p.m. - start trying to find the number for AT&T wireless road side assistance.

8:40 p.m. - call AT&T wireless roadside assistance since I pay them money monthly on the chance that I might break down. It takes 10 minutes to talk to someone, 10 more to tell her where we are. She finally say she has it figured out and will call me back in 10 minutes.

9:20 p.m. - wonder why no one has called me back.

9:45 p.m. - a surly man from Saunders towing in New Carlisle Ohio calls me and tells me that despite the fact that my towing is supposed to be free that I am going to have to pay extra because he is going to charge me mileage from his shop to my truck and then from my truck to where ever I want it towed. Which is not cool, the whole point is their service is supposed to start from where I am and then I get 5 to 10 miles. This wouldn't work any other way.

9:46 p.m. - kind man stops by and offers to tow my truck for the gallon of gas it's going to take him to tow my truck to my friends house 5 miles away.

10:00 p.m - kind mans truck arrives in front of my friends house, I pay the nice man more than he asks and about the same amount as the dude from Saunders towing had asked for. Really it was the principle of the thing, I'd rather reward someone for a good deed then give in to someone trying to exploit a situation.

10:05 p.m. - FINALLY restart for home with boat in tow.

11:00 p.m. - arrive home.